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I spat out my gum ostentatiously into the crumpled paper on which his contact information was scrawled, then tossed both into the waste can. Through the metallic taste of irony I congratulated myself on the third party casting. Good luck getting your third back into this threesome, Vanilla Girl. *Vanilla Girl, aka yours truly, had been with Shy Guy before in a one on one collision of equal appetites, or so I thought. A straight fuck, but a torrid one. Direct. Urgent.Once.After that “once”? Crickets. No, not exactly. A message: Had a great time, kitten. Thanks; it was really hot. Then crickets.Did a runaway libido deafen me to what I should have been better attuned? Does a dog whiz on trees? Turned out he already had a playmate whose absence had motivated him to seek attention elsewhere. Unfortunately, by the time I found out, I was already craving seconds. And hating myself for it.The numero uno tartlet might have been fluent in his preferred dirty dialect, but I had my own triple. LA DRIVER’S LICENSE APPLICATIONGREATER LOS ANGELES AREA DRIVER’S LICENSE APPLICATION:Name:______________ Stage name:________________Agent:______________ Attorney:__________________Sex: ___Male ___Female ___Formerly Male ___Formerly FemaleIf female, indicate breast implant size: ____Will the size of your implants hinder your ability to safely operate a motor vehicle in any way?Yes___ No ___Please list brand of cell phone: __________________. (If you don’t own a cell phone, please explain.)Please check hair color:Females: [ ] Blonde [ ] Platinum BlondeTeenagers: [ ] Purple [ ] Blue [ ] SkinheadPlease check activities you perform while driving: (Check all that apply)[ ] Eating[ ] Applying make-up[ ] Talking on the phone[ ] Slapping kids in the backseat[ ] Having sex[ ] Applying cellulite treatment to thighs[ ] Tanning[X] Snorting cocaine (already checked for ease of application)[ ] Watching TV[ ] Reading Variety[ ] Surfing the net via laptopPlease indicate how many times:a) you expect to.
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